A Human Experience

I am feeling very human today.

In the way it is sometimes said that we are not humans beings who have spiritual experiences, but we are spiritual beings having a human experience, I am feeling particularly human today.

Overwhelmed. Sad. Lonely. Disconnected. Mechanically moving through the day. Accomplishing nothing. Stuck in perpetual thought. Not understanding why.

I have an awareness that my soul, my True spiritual Self is still there, but she can't seem to be heard by my this human thing going on today. She's just there observing, with compassion and understanding, waiting for an opening to embrace and enter and envelop me once again.

Where is the sadness coming from? Why do I have such an empty tank? What is it that is missing? Am I doing something wrong?

I have felt inklings of this over the last month or so, but have avoided the depths of it for the most part. Talking myself out of it. Acting myself out of it. I guess there is only so far that "fake it 'til you make it" will go. I should have known: avoiding it doesn't work. So today I find myself sitting in it - well, wallowing in it - and trying desperately to work through it. It stinks. There is nothing fun about it. I don't feel like myself.

Yet I know God is here.
I know there is another side, and I will make it there.
I know God is good, and that I have something to learn in all this humanity.
May my sitting in it - my allowing space for it - prove beneficial in shaping me more into who I have been created to be.

You call me out upon the waters

The great unknown where feet may fail

And there I find You in the mystery

In oceans deep

My faith will stand

 

And I will call upon Your name

And keep my eyes above the waves

When oceans rise

My soul will rest in Your embrace

For I am Yours and You are mine

 

Your grace abounds in deepest waters

Your sovereign hand

Will be my guide

Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me

You've never failed and You won't start now

 

So I will call upon Your name

And keep my eyes above the waves

When oceans rise

My soul will rest in Your embrace

For I am Yours and You are mine

 

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders

Let me walk upon the waters

Wherever You would call me

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander

And my faith will be made stronger

In the presence of my Savior

I will call upon Your Name
Keep my eyes above the waves
My soul will rest in Your embrace
I am Yours and You are mine

-Hillsong United, Oceans

When you're going through something very human - sadness, depression, addiction, grief, anxiety - and you can only muster the energy to just take the next step, you really just need someone near you to know and to care. While having a someone with human skin to fill that role is always good, we must remember that God is nearer to us and cares more for us than we can ever imagine.

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned;
    the flames will not set you ablaze.

~ Isaiah 43:2

Truth & God's Most Excellent Harmonies

If asked, we would all likely say that we want to know the truth.

There is power and freedom in truth. We have tasted it and we know it.

But we tend to fill our minds - and thus, even our hearts - with lies, untruths, misspoken words, myths and false beliefs.

We replay our mistakes. We remind ourselves of the things we're not good at. We hold ourselves captive to over embellished and misplaced guilt. We tell ourselves to give up, to stop trying because we're not worth it. We replay the negative self-talk without even realizing it!

You're not good enough. You messed up too badly. You're not the one who gets to do that. You're not worthy of that. You are always messing up. Why can't you just get it right? Why can't you get your act together? You're too fat. You're too dumb. You're too short. You're too tall. You're too soft spoken. You're just the clown. You messed up before. You'll just embarrass yourself. You only disappoint.

Stop. Right. There.

Brothers and Sisters, fill your minds with, and meditate on, things that are true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. And God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.

Yes. Yes. Yes!

Do you see what Paul reminds us here in his letter to the Philippians (4:8-9)?

Paul knows. He gets it. He of all people had reason to replay the lies in his head. He struggled in the same way we do with his own issues (the "thorn" in his side) and struggles (prison, beatings, trials, and more) and past (as a murderer). Yet, he shared with everyone the secret he had learned to make it through all of this negativity. At the crux of his contentment and the fulfilling of his purpose was this practice: filling his mind with positive, truthful things.

So how will we claim truth, or even know it when it comes our way?

Yes, Truth is found in scripture. Truth is found in the life and being of Jesus. Truth can also be found in many other places. TRUTH himself created all things, so the avenues from which Truth springs forth are infinite.

Poetry, Nature, Paintings, Conversations, Books, Sermons, Meditation, Children, Work, Play....

Truth is revealed to us when we are open to receive it.

And that takes a shift.

A shift in our awareness. A practicing of openness to allow Truth to flow to you from wherever it may be revealed.  A willingness to let go of our own thoughts, whatever they may be, and to hear the Truth from TRUTH. A shift away from talking and toward listening.

Have you ever heard a line in a song or on a TV show, in a book or a movie, that spoke directly into your being. Truth was revealed to you in that moment. No need to over-think it. Just accept it.

Have you ever seen a beautiful sunset, a rainbow, a lake, a mountain and been struck still in awe? Truth was revealed to you in that moment. Don't let it go too quickly. Take it in - deep within.

Have you ever heard a simple statement from your child that maybe didn't mean much to him, but meant the world to you? Truth was revealed to you in that moment. Marinate in that moment. Let your soul absorb it.

Begin believing moments like these. Don't discount them as happenstance and return to your negative self-talk! Instead, believe them! That is God speaking to you. That is God re-directing your thoughts. That is God turning your lies into Truth, little by little.

When we are reminded by Paul to think about good, positive, truthful things, he adds that God can then begin to work "his most excellent harmonies" within us.

My friends, we are all worthy of God's most excellent harmonies! That is what we were created for!

What is it that you are wanting to accomplish? What is it that you are stuck on? What is it that your mind and heart are racing in the hamster wheel about?

Begin to open yourself up to filling your mind and heart with more Truth and see what happens!

My friends, we can change the world!